Bloody savages.

I don't have much to report from last night. I stayed in, watched my new X-Men DVD and went to sleep at like 9:30. The interesting stuff happened shortly after.

I woke up at about 1:45 to the sound of crashing in my courtyard. I got up and carefully looked around the corner, through the window into my courtyard. There was a brand new broken beer bottle and some sort of toilet paper or something that was soaked and rolled up. I looked up to see if I could see the culprit, and to my surprise I saw a guy climbing the pipes down right into my courtyard. Not wanting to interrupt, I sat there and watched. He got down, looked around (it seemed as if he looked right at me) but then went about his business. He picked up my keg (with one hand) and started climbing back up. He dropped it and it made this really loud noise. He kept climbing up and his friend was like "Get the keg", to which he replied "It's cashed", and the friend replied "Then bust it!". I had enough by this point and yelled "Don't bust the keg". My window was closed, and they were too drunk to be able to figure out who said it. They looked around all paranoid-ish, and he finished his climb to the window in record time. They shut their window and that was that.

I'm really going to have to do something about that courtyard problem. My door isn't very secure at all... any retard could just climb down and walk right in.

Later in the night I heard pounding at my back door. Now, my back door goes to my building's laundry room. So, the person pounding had to be living in my building. I was getting up to see who it was, until I heard weird screaming. Now, I don't want to sound mean, but I think that's impossible here. It truly sounded like a retarded lady screaming. She kept saying things like "LET ME INTO THIS APARTMENT".

So, I need a clever way to deal with this courtyard nonsense. Any ideas? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?