A horribly detailed account of the last few days.

I'm going to pick things up on Saturday, since I didn't get into it last time.

So, I had plans with Steph to go out to a nice dinner and to see Planet of the Apes. I got the phone call from my dad telling me my grandma had just died, so I called up Steph to cancel our plans. I didn't get to tell her why, since I only talked to her mom, and I didn't have much time before Robert picked me up.

Robert picked me up and we were on our way to Grandma's house. They had just finished taking apart the hospital bed that was set up in the living room and were carrying to a big van. Robert and I helped finish the job and went in to visit with the family.

Everyone was in surprisingly good spirits considering Grandma had just died a few hours before. It was expected, of course. She was on a downhill slide for quite some time, and just when we thought it couldn't get worse, it did. I think all of us were kind of relieved at her passing. As horrible as it is to have someone die, it's much more horrible to try and keep them alive and in pain for your own benefit.

We went out to dinner at a truck stop down the street. I had ravioli that did horrible things to my stomach. Conversation was awkward, but pleasant. There was no crying, with the exception of my mom tearing up a bit when she asked Robert and I to be pall bearers. We accepted, of course.

I went back to my apartment where Alan had a long list of messages from me. Weird, considering how rarely I've been called the last few days, weeks, whatever. I tried returning some of the calls, but to no avail. Steph's mom said Steph was worried about me because I canceled the plans and Robert picked me up. She assumed something was wrong with my sister, for some reason. Everyone always worries about the pregnant chick, I guess.

Some of Alan and Fabish's friends were at the apartment. Fabish and crew were hitting some bars, and Alan was going to a party down the street. Both groups invited me along, but I declined. I wasn't too eager to tell them about my grandma, since that's sort of a 'downer', and they were trying to have fun on a Saturday night. Eventually they got too pushy, so I told them I just wasn't up to it after my grandma had just died.

I went to bed early, and Sunday was just plain uneventful. I fiddled on the computer and Steph and Molly came over to watch Jackass.

Monday I went to work for a while. I was really productive, but I left at noon. The visitation was more than an hour away, and started at 6, but at my work you can only take bereavement days in 4 hour chunks, so I went ahead and took a full half day. The visitation was horribly crowded, which no one really expected. All the relatives I knew passed through the line within the first half hour or so, so for the next 2 hours I was introduced to people who were only kind of related to me through many, many different people. It's odd, because my dad's side of the family are the ones to exercise, diet, and take care of themselves really well, and they all die very early. My mom's side all smoke, eat too much, and don't really do anything to take care of themselves and they live forever. My great grandma died at 94, and my grandpa is 80 and spunkier than I am. I hope I inhereted their long life gene.

The next day, today, was the funeral. I was a pall bearer for the 3rd time. The first time was for my other grandma's funeral, and the 2nd time was for Jill Zarr. It was horribly hot outside, but it was nice to see everyone I don't get to see often. I have a cousin named Eric who I barely consider a cousin. See, I'm the youngest of any of my cousins, with the exception of 2 who live down in Georgia who I never see. But the oldest of any of these close cousins is only 5 years older than I am. Well, Eric is 10 years older than me, so it's hard to view him in the same light as the others. I used to really look up to him as a kid, and I still think he's an incredibly smart and talented guy.

I also got to see Craig, who is either my 2nd cousin or 1st cousin once removed... I can never keep them straight. A really nice guy, almost exactly my age. We talked about his college, which is a small private school about 100 miles away. I actually was quite close to some people in high school who went there, and Craig knew quite a few of them. Small world. He'll probably go back there and tell them we're related, and they'll be all shocked and bring it up to me next time we see eachother.

There was a lunch in the chuch basement, and we mingled for a while but got bored. Me, Russ, and Robert found our way to the church playroom and spent our time playing fooseball (no idea how to spell that) and ping pong.

The saddest part of the whole event, I think, was as we were leaving. We were trying to decide on plans for the remainder of the day when my mom asked if we were headed to Grandpa's house. He said "Sure, we can go back to our place. Or, I mean, my place." They had been married 54 years... it's hard to adjust to things like that, I think. He's a tough cookie though. He'll be fine.

I drove back, and here I am. Doing nothing in particular. It feels like tomorrow will be Monday, but it won't... it'll be Wednesday. That's a good feeling. I have to pay bills tomorrow though. That's a bad feeling.