So, it started off as a bad day today. First off, my pornography career went right down the drain. I got the email today saying that my porn drawings weren't attracting a big crowd, so my services were no longer needed. I had really been banking on that job to pay my rent until something legitimate came along. With the job over and done with, I had to start looking for something REAL all of the sudden.
It was odd, though. I started off being a bit pissed off. The more I thought about it, the more upset and crappy I felt. I mean, if I can't draw good enough porn pictures, what can I draw? What are the chances of me becoming a great artist if I can't even hold the most pathetic job in the art industry.
But, on the other hand, it was porn. Which is totally lame. And humiliating. And non-reliable. I mean, it's not like they had a great reputation and I couldn't make the grade. They publish fucked up porn, and I guess my porn wasn't fucked up enough to fit in their library.
Jaimee recommended a book which lists tons and tons and tons of places that are always accepting new artists. Magazines, greeting cards, posters, comic books, books, galleries, etc. I went though it tonight, highlighting a bunch of them that I plan on sending samples to. While I don't expect to land even a small portion of the the ones I apply for, I do have my hopes up for one or two. And the best part... this is legitimate work that I'm not ashamed to do and don't feel dirty about.
In the meantime, I have rent to pay and no way to pay it. That sucks. But I still have my sights set on becoming a famous artist. I hope this whole pornography thing was a blessing in disguise.