What in the

What in the hell kind of January is this? Seriously. The temperatures are hovering right about 45 and its RAINING. Rain. In January. In freaking Illinois. Yeah, we got a pretty massive and ridiculous snow in November, but since... nothin'.

This rain should be snow. I'm pissed that I wasted my $.79 on a snow scraper for my car. Polk's winter defiance party seems like a waste now since it's like spring out there with all the rain and non-coldness. And what about the kids and their snow days? The poor gradeschoolers. What a bullshit winter. That's right. This winter is bullshit. BULLSHIT!

I remember when I was in 7th or 8th grade and we had a ton of freezing rain. Fabish and I took the chance to go down to the dam and slide down to the bottom without assisstance from a sled. It was a fun 10 second trip down, but not nearly as eventful as the 2 hours it took to climb back up on account of the snow being frozen solid and slippery. I also remember many winters past that Fabish and I would dare each other to go as far onto the frozen lake as possible. It was always a bad idea, but only backfired once. Not a bad record, considering. And we'd also build snow ramps on the dam and see who could jump their sled the furthest. Fabish always won on account of him being half my size, but one time the hand of God touched me and I flew  at least the length of 3 football fields. We'd top off the festivities at Fabish's house, where his mom would make us hot chocolate with marshmallows and yell at us for not taking our boots off close enough to the door and tracking crap in.

Those were good winters. This one... bullshit.

What a lemon! One minute it's running like a top, and the next it's broken down on the side of the road. And I can't fix a car like this, because I don't have the tools! And even if I did have the tools I don't know if I could fix a car like this - Dignan, Bottle Rocket

← Home