Dear August Are

Dear August,

Are you having some sort of odd identity crisis? You are not October, so please, stop trying to be October. You're a good month, and it's time you stopped impersonating other months and were just your own month.

Mid-August in Central Illinois should be in the mid-nineties. It's not like I'm looking forward to the electical bills, but c'mon, I'm not ready for fall yet.

I like wearing shorts to show off my nice legs, so please, August, just warm back up to where you're supposed to be. I've dealt with your mid-sixties nonsense without complaining for 3 or 4 days now, and it's time you got it together, got back up to at least 90, and maybe rained a little more often.

Thank you for your time,
Residents of Central Illinois