I think my

I think my favorite part of the whole week is Friday when I get off work before anyone else can do anything with me, and I get to sit around waiting to eat dinner with my boyz. I really do love those few hours when I know I'll be largely uninterrupted, since it's part of the normal work week and people wouldn't expect me to be home. It's like every week I'm cheating the system by staying home and playing hookie or something. I'm a fan.

Anyway, I went out to dinner with my boyz 2 nights in a row, which was awesome. Last night they brought their respective ladies. After one of the most amazing ham and cheese sandwiches and Blue Moon, it was time to head to Jimmy's to watch old people to Jager bombs. I don't do them, but I like watching others do them. Angie's dad totally kicked ass at them, downing them like water. The old people left and Wolfie and Alan showed up. Wolfie left to look at nude girls, but I stuck around with a promise of seeing a friend I haven't seen in a while.

About an hour later I headed out to see some naked girls myself. It was my first trip to Elliot's, the newest strip bar here. In a word, it was fucking lame. I spent my time giving shit to the waitress and Rockstar Joey. Devon Michaels, apparently some famous porn star of some sort, gave me a lap dance and proceeded to just sit there and talk to me for like half an hour. I know I'm charming and all, but you just kind of run out of topics to talk about with a stripper/porn star. When she told me she made her living by fucking and sucking, I replied "Oh yeah? I work for an insurance company." She laughed a little, but still seemed to want to talk to me. We discussed her first lesbian experience, her rise to porn stardom, whether it's a good idea for a porn star to have an agent, and on and on and on. She was an interesting lady I guess. I'd never seen any of her movies.

I had better conversation with Mary, the nice waitress who Joey had a crush on. I tried to set them up on a date to Red Lobster, but fell short of my goal. He asked me if I could run some sort of teleprompter for him so he could talk to girls like I could. I told him the secret is to 1. be angry about the lack of alcohol, and 2. not give a shit what they think either way, and 3. strippers and the waitresses in strip joints are paid to pretend they like you, no matter what. You can do whatever you want and still leave thinking you are a handsome charming devil because they'll always laugh and pretend you're the shit, hoping for a bigger tip. If nothing else, a trip to the strip club is always a confidence builder (after all, I feel really strong now after beating some random half naked girl at arm wrestling).

Around 2:45ish, I decided I was tired and I didn't like Elliot's. I made my escape, walking past several cop cars and guys in handcuffs because some fight had broken out. Quite an event.

So what about this snow and winter, huh? Awesome.

You're not funny, Tom. You're fat, and look as though you should be, but you're not. - Soap, Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels